Calling Local Army Members

local army members. over the past year, i have requested help with all sorts of crazy things. web services, dentistry, butt paste, etc,. but this one takes the cake. and if someone manages to find help, it'll eat the cake as well.

as most of you know, my pain threshold is at it's limit. the end of the pain chart with the guy with the shit-taking face? that with flames out the ears. nd no, this isn't a call for drugs. it's wierder.

i know have a cyst under my armpit. the kind that hurts like a mofo and needs to be lanced with a scalpel and stuffed with packing material to drain all that blood and puss (i refer to that affectionately as wound tampons). however, moving me right now is not only difficult, but very painful, even without this.

here's the impossible request. does anyone know a doctor, yes a doctor, willing to take enough pity to lance this at home? i come with my own nurses, insurance, and witty banter! extra pay fior makin a house call.

the thought that one of you may know my savior, but free case of beer /bottle of wine finders fee. from what i remember, any discapline can do it. inject lidocaine, scalpel cyst, pop like massive zit, insert wound tampon. so if someone is not only well connected enough to know a doc, but one withh a huge heart please let me know. i'm dyin' here, nyuck nyuck.


[reposted by admin]